Why Kagome hates Saturdays
by Marukaite Chikyuu Doitsu
Summary: Okay, so maybe it wasn't the day itself, rather, the events during that particular Saturday. Being attacked by a giant plant monster, being late back to S.H.I.E.L.D. from her lunch break, spilling tea on her favorite shirt, being hit on by Tony Stark, going to Uncle Eyepatch's office of doom... Yeah. At least she got to see Coulson freak over Captain America... T to be safe!


MCD: So. Yeah. Hi.

*cough cough* …. So, how 'bout them Avengers?

Have a filler oneshot while I desperately try to finish homework and chapters.

**~Avengers!~**

Today had gone to _shit._

Saturdays were no longer Kagome's favorite day, she decided while angrily scrubbing at a tea stain on her favorite white shirt.

Tuesdays sounded nice. Had a better ring to it than 'Saturday'.

Yeah, Tuesdays were good.

I suppose some background information is required:

-_Earlier that day_-

The sun was bright and the sky was a clear and cheery blue, the birds were singing and everything was calm.

Of course, Kagome was looking outside her office window, instead of experiencing it for herself.

Now, our Asian heroine didn't mind working on Saturdays: quite the opposite, as not many people worked on the weekend, so raised pay for her! As if her pay weren't glamorous enough already, more of it just meant more things she could afford to buy things on a whim~

Glancing at her watch, Kagome walked away from the windows and over to her desk, turning her computer on 'sleep' mode and grinning.

"Break time~" she gleefully mumbled and grabbed her jacket and purse from her chair. She rushed down the hallway and toward the elevator, catching it right before the doors closed. The doors slid back open and she blinked, then smiled, at her friend and coworker.

"Coulson! Why are you working on a weekend?" she called the middle-aged man out on his work schedule, as she often did. "Are you trying to snatch a piece of my pay by working today?" she accused in a falsely scandalized tone. He chuckled at her and moved back, leaning against the railing so she could press a floor button.

"What's up with you, Kags? Are you always so suspicious?" he retorted. She rolled her eyes but her cheery grin remained.

"You know it! And you _also _know it's saved my butt more than once!" she winked at him and he snorted.

"Ooh, sneaking out on secret missions while the fur-less and the furious isn't looking? Naughty girl, keeping secrets! I thought you were a Foreign Communications expert, not one of Agent Romanoff's kind." Kagome fought to keep the wicked grin from curling on her face.

"Fur-less and the furious? I don't think Uncle angry-eye is gonna like that one!" Kagome poked him in the ribs with her elbow. He looked at her incredulously.

"And you think calling him uncle angry-eye is any better?"

"Touche, monsieur Coulson!" Phil groaned.

"Please, no more switching languages. I just got back from that European mission a little while ago and my tongue is _still _bleeding." Kagome laughed and shifted her jacket to her other arm.

"You should come with me to get some tea or something! C'mon, you need to unwind, Phil. You get too worked up. It's on the house~" Kagome tempted, holding foot outside the elevator to keep it open. Phil contemplated the offer before shaking his head with a sigh.

"I can't, Kags. Gotta get these files down to Sector 5," he frowned, waving the manila folder. "Buy me a cup of straight black coffee and I'll meet you at your office in..." he checked his watch, "...say, 15-20 minutes?"

"Deal," Kagome smiled and stepped into the main lobby of the New York S.H.I.E.L.D. building. "Don't be late!" she called over her shoulder and waved, practically skipping toward the front doors.

"Right back at you!"

And with that, Kagome was outside in the wonderful weather she had been observing. Sighing in content, Kagome hummed to herself and looked around. There was a new cafe right down the block somewhere that sold her favorite tea and cookies...

Spotting the road it was on, Kagome hurriedly crossed the street. She was lucky she worked on the outskirts of the big business section of the city, so she didn't have to walk down a bunch of corporate blocks to find to a decent meal.

Before she knew it, Kagome was outside the cafe, her two drinks in a cardboard container in one hand and a little bag of goodies in the other.

"That didn't take long," Kagome mumbled happily to herself and speed-walked toward a small square. The square, on the side of the main road, was pretty much a miniature park, with a couple of trees over some benches for shade, a healthy lawn of grass and a bunch of flowers to boot. A perfect place to relax for a few moments, before she had to go back to the office.

Sitting on an unoccupied bench, Kagome hummed in content and stretched her legs out, her work-length-required gray skirt stretching a bit uncomfortably at the knees. She simply pulled it up a bit and sighed again, relaxing in the calm shade.

This was the life! After having lost her teenage years to the Feudal Era, she figured it was a present of redemption from the gods to have given her such a nice older life! She was still young and adventurous of course, but that didn't seem to bother S.H.I.E.L.D. She was sent on the occasional mission, nothing too strenuous, but she got to sit back and relax in her office for long periods. It was perfect!

"I love America..." Kagome sighed, smiling, and letting her eyes flutter closed.

"So do I, ma'am, and that's why I have to ask you to move," a strained voice called from in front of her and her eyes snapped open in shock.

_'Holy shit,' _Kagome's jaw dropped a little when she saw the back of a _very _muscular man holding a shield out in front of him. A monster of some sort was pushing against the front of the shield, making the man's heels dig into the ground. And then Kagome realized the obvious.

As if the blue suit with red-and-white stripes around the abdomen weren't clue enough, the shield in front of him and the monster should have made common sense smack her in the side of the head.

_'Captain America!'_

"Captain America!?" she shouted, too shocked to state anything other than the obvious. He simply groaned in response, shifting on the feet that had been pushed back by a foot already. The monster – something that looked like a rabid yellow dandelion/venus fly trap monster on chemical growth and steroids – had smashed its face against the Captain's shield, snapping viciously and trying to take hold of the super-rare metal with its teeth. Luckily, the shield was too big for it to fit its mouth around, but there was still the matter of the vines lashing out around it.

"Oh _come on!_" Kagome moaned in frustration, stomping her foot and standing up. "Really? Weed monsters? And on my day off, too!"

"Ma'am," the Captain managed to groan out, his voice sounding like he was choking on something particularly thick, "get to safety-!" he grunted and pushed the monster back a foot by sheer force. Kagome simply rolled her eyes.

"I am so _sick _of monsters by now!" she hissed to herself. "Making me break my cover because they're threatening one goddamn city!" Angrily, Kagome erected a barrier of glowing pink before stomping around the struggling super hero. The monster focused on her and roared, lashing its vines out like whips. Kagome scoffed as they smacked into the barrier and disintegrated, causing the beast to howl in pain.

Captain America, having lost a lot of pressure on his shield, pushed forward and threw the shield while the monster was distracted. A few vines were cut off, but they grew right back. _Then _he noticed the civilian.

"Miss, what are-!" he shouted in shock, but Kagome held up her hand, motioning for him to stop. She turned around, looking rather pissed off.

"Son, don't even _go _there!" she growled and stalked toward the base of the rabid plant, burning vines as she went. The Captain visibly balked, staring after her with a startled look. Had she really just called him _son? _Not to be narcissistic, but _did she know who she was talking to?_

He was even more shocked and amazed by the fact that she was simply walking _through _the vines. They couldn't even touch her! She stomped childishly forward, and when she reached the thick stalk of the monster plant, she simply placed her hands on it and it.. well, it _disintegrated_.That was the only proper term as the beast just seemed to fall into shining particles, floating away, despite the fact that there was no breeze.

She clapped her hands vertically as if cleaning dust off them and turned on her heel, walking heavily back to her bench.

"Gettin' tired of your shit, universe!"she scowled, dusting off and straightening her skirt before turning around a plopping herself, ungracefully, onto her bench. Her eyes snapped shut, but her form remained rigid. Captain America stood there somewhat awkwardly, realizing he had just been saved, and by a civilian, with magical powers no less! He shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot before pulling down his mask. He coughed into his hand, almost wincing when one of the woman's eyes snapped open.

"Erhm, thank you, miss, for saving me back there..." he said, shyly pointing at the hole in the ground where the weed monster was once rooted. Her rigid slouch relaxed and she sat up, smiling softly.

"No problem, Captain. Just here to help." she said quietly and he nodded. The awkward tension returned when the Captain did not reply, unsure of what to really say. He knew there was some sort of protocol about incidents like this, but it seemed rude to take the kind woman into his custody after she just saved him.

"Captain America?" he blinked out of his thoughts and stared at her with soft, sky-blue eyes. "Um, your shield..." she pointed toward the far end of the square, where his shield lay among the grasses.

"Oh, thank you..." he murmured, but before he turned, he looked at her with a polite smile, "...Actually, would you mind terribly coming with me? I don't know if there are more of those things waiting to pop up, but it seems you can handle them better than I can..." he felt childish, as if he were asking his mother to help him cross the street, but she simply smiled and nodded, grabbing her things before standing and walking side-by-side with the super hero.

The square was devoid of other people, probably having to do with the fact that a monster had up and attacked the very spot just moments ago. The quiet sounds of the city in the distance made up for the lack of conversation though, and soon Captain America's shield was latched firmly back into place on his back.

"Thank you, for all of your help, missus..." he trailed, smiling at her. Her own smile returned, and Steve realized that this extraordinary woman's eyes were the same color as his, but more... _electrifying. _

"Kagome, Kagome Higurashi. It's a pleasure to meet you in real life, Captain." she smiled and shifted her bag of goodies to the crook of her other arm, holding out her hand. He gave it a firm shake, returning her cheerful smile.

"Please, call me Steve," he returned, his smile twisting as if he'd bitten something sour, "something tells me we're going to become closer over the next few weeks anyways."

"If you think it's because S.H.I.E.L.D's going to take me away, I'm one step ahead of you," she huffed, "because I've got to get back there soon anyway, my break ends in..." blinking suddenly, she glanced at her watch and gasped.

"Dammit! My break was over twenty minutes ago!" she cried out. "Phil's gonna be _pissed-!_"

"Actually, I think I'm more concerned than pissed," Coulson interrupted, walking up behind her. Kagome jumped, having been snuck up on, and her tea fell out of the cardboard container, hitting the ground and popping open. The back splash flew up and covered parts of her shirt and her skirt.

"Dammit, Phil!" she cried out angrily, glaring at him and setting her jacket, the bag of goodies and the cup of black coffee on the ground. "This was my favorite white shirt! The skirt is fine 'cos it's gray, but how am I supposed to take care of this stain if I'm being brought in for questioning!_?_" she whined, paying more attention to her shirt than the situation at hand.

Phil simply shook his head. At that moment Steve made himself known by stepping forward.

"Agent Coulson, please, let's let miss Kagome change her shirt before we bring her back to head quarters. She _is _a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent after all, I'd assume she's trustworthy, if anything," he pleaded her case and blushed faintly at the thankful, gratifying look she sent his way. Coulson's eyes widened substantially and he stammered, suddenly losing his cool.

"I- uh, well, I guess! Yes, I mean, as long as she only takes her shirt off! I mean, in privacy, of course! Not here, definitely not here in public where people could-!" he fidgeted, deciding then was a good time to shut his mouth. Steve stared at his fellow agent sympathetically for some reason while Kagome covered her mouth to keep from snickering. Coulson's eye twitched when she mouthed _'Quit being such a fangirl!'_ from behind the Captain.

And well, that's where we are now. Kagome was busy trying to scrub a stain into oblivion while Coulson waited outside the changing room for her.

"Agent Higurashi, we don't have all day," Coulson hummed with reserve, and had Kagome been able to glare through solid objects, Coulson would probably be dead right about now.

"Chill, Phil! And what's with the sudden business-y attitude? Reminded of your sense of duty because Cappy Dearest appeared to battle a wild Pokemon?" Kagome hissed, but sighed, giving up on her shirt and grabbing the less comfortable one, a company-issued shirt, that had been hanging on a hook at her disposal. Coulson's eyebrows hiked up.

"Kagome, I just learned that you have apparent magical powers and can defeat monsters like they're not even a threat. And did you _really _just compare _the _Captain America to a child's card game?" Phil asked incredulously, turning to look at the door like it was stupid. The look was meant for her, but Phil can't glare through solid objects either.

"Says the one with the mint-condition trading card collection of Mr. America 1940."

"There were no Mr. America competitions in the 40's!"

"You would know, because you probably looked to see if Steve had won it!"

"..."

"Gotcha," Kagome smirked and stepped out of the changing booth. She pulled some strands of her raven hair out of the back of her collar. Grabbing her jacket and her bag of sweets from her fellow agent, she walked ahead of him.

"We heading toward the lion's den?" she asked as they stepped into the hallway. She peered into her bag of goodies and gasped.

"Coulson! You ate half of my cookies!" Phil rolled his eyes, smiling crookedly.

"Yeah, we're going to Fury's off-oof!" he puffed as Kagome elbowed him in the ribs.

"Jerk! That was my only lunch." she grumbled and he smacked the back of her head, making her head fall forward.

"And you saw how stupid I get when I'm around Captain America. Consider us even." he atoned, but Kagome would have none of it. She plucked Coulson's cup of coffee from his hand and skipped ahead of him, drinking some of it. She made over-exaggerated gagging noise and her face scrunched up.

"I don't know how you drink this stuff," she moaned, picking out a cookie and eating it slowly, as to get the taste of the coffee out of her mouth. Coulson could feel his eye twitching as he grabbed the cup back from her.

"Well I can't now, it would be unsanitary." he grumbled and dropped it in a passing trash bin.

"Wuss." Kagome hummed nonchalantly, ducking forward. Coulson's hand flew right over her head and she laughed.

After a few more minutes of playful banter, the duo had made it to Agent Nick Fury's office. Coulson chuckled when Kagome made the sign of the cross and continued to wave her hand around her in over-exaggerated motions, as if it would help her doomed soul.

"Calm down Agent Higurashi. You know you're his favorite," he chuckled and gave her a reassuring smile before opening the door and holding it out for her like a gentleman.

Taking a deep breath, Kagome stepped into the room and threw out her arms, grinning widely at her boss.

"Uncle Angry-eye!" she called out warmly.

"Sit down." Shot down, Kagome quickly hopped into the seat in front of his desk. Director Fury wasn't even at his desk, he was standing, looking out the windows on the left side of his office. She fidgeted slightly before settling into an innocent look, batting her eyelashes excessively. When he turned around. He merely snorted, amused, and walked over to his desk.

"I assume you know why I called you here-" Kagome raised her hand and Fury's eyebrow shot up. "Yes Higurashi?"

"Uhm, yeah. Can we skip the whole principal's-office-guilt thing and just skip to the part where you yell at me, pat me on the head, give me a lollipop and send me on my way?" Kagome asked hopefully, sticking out her lower lip in a ridiculous pout. Nick smacked his face, rubbing his temples.

"Kago-" he started, but the door banged open. One of them had its top hinge broken and the Captain shrunk in the doorway, staring guiltily at the damage.

"Uhm, sorry, sir, I didn't mean to-" he tried to right the door, but instead broke it off. Flinching, he swiveled around, placing the metal door against the other one. He flinched again at the sight of the hole in the wall where the doorknob had hit and the partially broken frame.

"I, er, I didn't mean... I hadn't realized..." Steve mumbled blankly, hands clenching and unclenching in worry. The director sighed and waved it off.

"No worries, Captain. I'll have someone come up and fix that. Now, what are you here for?" Not missing a beat, Fury sat back in his seat as he addressed the Avengers leader. Kagome peered around the high back of her seat and smiled brightly, giving a small wave in the Captain's direction.

"Hi Steve!" she grinned and he nodded back. He quickly stood at attention.

"I'm here to request that you not give any penalties to Agent Higurashi for her actions, nor that you test her abilities and try to use them," the super soldier's jaw was set with tension, "Kagome is a brave woman, and although she would be a marvelous addition to our assets, something tells me she's tired of fighting." he glanced at the young Japanese woman and she cooed softly, placing a hand on her heart at Steve's touching addition. Fury simply watched the two for a moment before opening his mouth to speak, but he was again interrupted.

"Aww, Stevey, baby, why'd you hurry past me without even a -well _he-llo _there, beautiful!" Tony's speech reeled at the sight of the cute Japanese woman in the chair. Steve's face had gone a vibrant red and he coughed into his hand, muttering something along the lines of "why the hell would I ever say that,". Kagome flushed a pretty pink, gave a little noise that sounded like a squeak and turned around in her chair, facing Fury with an embarrassed expression.

"I don't even care what my sentence is now Director, please get me out of here!" Stark gave a fake pout, leaning on her chair and casting a sly look in her direction.

"Yeowch! You catch my eye and shoot me down as soon as I say a simple hello!" he cried out dramatically, holding the back of his hand to his forehead and looking away. Kagome snorted, slipping down in her chair and crossing her arms.

"The fact that I catch your eye hurts my self esteem. Do I really look like an easy fuck, Mr. Playboy?" Kagome scoffed. Tony grinned and leaned over the arm of her chair.

"You forgot the genius-billionaire-philanthropist part~" he teased and she groaned like a frustrated five-year-old.

"Uncle Eye-paaaaaatch!" Kagome whined falsely, kicking her feet against the director's desk, "Get him out of heeeeeere!"

"You know you love me~"

"I don't even know you!"

"Le gasp! You don't recognize my toned physique, gorgeous face-"

"-And glowing arch reactor? Calm your fangirling self, Iron Ego."

"Guys, this is getting out of hand. Tony, quit messing with Agent Higurashi. Higurashi-"

"-Kagome, Steve, I'm not my mother-"

"-Kagome, stop playing along to Tony's antics."

"She started it!"

"Did _not_!"

"I don't care _who _started it, I'm going to end it-"  
_"__ENOUGH!"_

The super soldier, the miko, and the genius-billionaire-playboy-philanthropist were instantly silenced from the director's outburst. His jaw was set in a hard, tense line and if you looked closely, you could see him trembling slightly in anger. He pointed to Kagome.

"You! S.H.I.E.L.D. knew about your powers all along, that's partially why we hired you! There are no penalties or punishments for using your powers to protect people." he looked to Steve, "You can leave along with her- your business is finished here. Scram!" Kagome yelped and scrambled out of the chair, walking quickly out of the office with Steve. Fury rounded on Ironman, who looked rather bored now that his prey had left. "And _you!_" he pointed, giving him a deadpan look, "...grow _up _already!" he huffed and pointed to the door. Tony rolled his eyes and walked out, stomping like the drama queen he was.

Nick fell back into his chair, not even realizing he had stood up. He rubbed his temples roughly and closed his eyes.

"Why do I put up with this shit," he bemoaned himself, and the people in the offices looked out their doors, staring at either the gaping entryway where the director's doors used to be, or at the odd quartet of the two agents and two Avengers walking in the opposite direction.


End file.
